| I believe you should live each day as if it is your last, which is why I don't have any clean laundry because, come on, who wants to wash clothes on the last day of their life |
| I've learned that although it's hard to admit it, I'm secretly glad my parents are strict. |
| Whenever I start getting sad about where I am in my life, I think about the last words of my favorite uncle A truck |
| The people who think Tiny Tim is strange are the same ones who think it odd that I drive without pants. |
